Monday
October 29, 2001: Duncan McKinlay was really ticked off for
the first 19 years of his life. He didn't like himself, causing others
to feel the same. His relationship with his family was on thin ice,
ever since the family holiday when Duncan was seven and his abdominal
muscles tightened up, causing him to stop the family van several times
to use the washroom ... but, couldn't. His friends and classmates would
laugh at his behaviour. He felt lonely, depressed and suicidal because
he didn't know what was wrong with him.
As
time went on he was more ticked off. And then, one day in Grade 12,
Duncan came home for lunch and started reading an Ann Landers column
on Tourette Syndrome. His jaw dropped. He finally could put a label
on his condition. Duncan was so happy he went to share the news with
his family.
"They
just thought it was another one of Duncan's excuses," he says on
his cell phone.
But
it wasn't. It was the real deal. And once Duncan knew he had Tourette
Syndrome he was more comfortable with himself. So comfortable, in fact,
that he has decide to dedicate much of his life
to helping people with Tourette Syndrome. He just spent the weekend
in Edmonton leading workshops called "Life's A Twitch." And
today is the first day of Tourette Syndrome Awareness Week.
Tourette
is a neurological condition which causes someone to repeat actions over
and over without any control. As Duncan says, the brain has brakes that
stop motor movement. But with Tourette, the brakes don't really work.
"If
someone with Tourette goes through a doorway and they blink at the same
time as they go through the door, then they will do it every time they
go through the door," Duncan says.
They're
known as tics. Throughout our conversation, Duncan produces a barking
sound every few minutes. He also turns his head, quickly, which has
caused many visits to the chiropractor.
As
a child, living through tics were embarrassing, and sometimes humiliating.
But once he knew he had Tourette, things were better.
"After
I was diagnosed with Tourette the tic floodgates opened. Because before
that I was always trying to hide a tic. And the only way I can describe
hiding a tic is having this incredible itch and not being able to scratch
it.
"I
remember going to the washroom and watching myself tic in the mirror.
I used to hit myself to try to stop me from ticking. They never did.
It felt like I had demons in my head and they were torturing me."
Duncan
says he felt like a victim. But looking back now, he says it was his
own attitude that was holding him back.
"Since
my diagnosis I have really changed as an individual," he says.
"I have empowerment and want to help others."
Just
this month, the 28-year-old became a doctor and is working towards becoming
a psychologist. He wants to work with children who have Tourette. He
is currently working at the Bloorview MacMillian Children's Centre in
Toronto.
But
his big task is to educate people about Tourette. Duncan is doing just
that as a volunteer with the Tourette Syndrome Foundation of Canada
and he has his own website, www.lifesatwitch.com
"I
really believe 99 per cent of people aren't rude - [they] don't know
how to react to certain behaviour, such as tics."
Tourette
Syndrome is said to touch one per cent of the population. A lot of people,
Duncan says, just don't know they have it.
"I've
been to workshops on Tourette and have met an 80-year-old man who said,
'They always told me it was my nerves' ."
For
more information, call Cathy at 488-0753.
Because
nobody should go through life ticked off.
